Unfortunately, my legendary prowess with the opposite sex came to the forefront as I answered, “Absolutely, that would be great!” I promptly strolled into class, leaving her behind.
Story #9
Back in high school, I was having a Snapchat conversation with a girl. There was a momentary pause in her responses, and then she surprised me by sending a post-shower selfie. In the picture, her arm barely covered her chest, and the caption read, “Come play zombies.”
In my infinite wisdom, I responded with, “Do you have Xbox Live?” She replied with a disappointing, “No.” Not to be deterred, I continued, “Then how will we play?” She responded with a simple “Idk.” That was the end of the photo show. Her shirt was back on in the next snap.
A decade later, I still cringe at my own obliviousness.
Story #10
Embarked on a brief road trip with a coworker. While arranging hotel accommodations, she cleverly suggested, “Let’s book a single room with separate beds; it’ll be more cost-effective.” Recognizing the practicality, I went ahead and made the booking. Later that night, as we settled into our sleeping arrangements, I shared a YouTube video with her on my phone. She playfully insisted, “Get comfy! Why perch on the edge?” while lifting the comforter, inviting me to join her on her bed, which I did without a second thought.
While chatting, I reached across for a bottle of water situated on a nearby table, inadvertently brushing against her bra strap with my elbow. Swiftly apologizing, I took a sip from the bottle. Then came her curious query, “Is my bra getting in your way?” My brilliant response? “Nah, I got the bottle, no worries!”
It was only a day after our road trip had concluded that the reality of the situation dawned on me. Yes, I’m well aware that I hold the title of ultimate dimwit in this tale.
